Thursday, August 28, 2008

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Erie whiffleballers play 24-hour game...

I've been slacking on here, but this aught to redeem myself at least a little...

ALBION -- No one struck out when it came to playing a marathon whiffle-ball game over the weekend for charity and a scholarship fund...They recorded the marathon on tape. It began at 7 p.m. Friday and ended at about 7 p.m. Saturday. (Whiffle-ball game for charity lasts 24 hours, sets record - Erie Times-News)

I think these stats speak for themselves...

  • Final Score: 935 - 514, the game ended in the top of the 149th inning (there was no need for the home team to bat in the bottom half...with a 421 run lead)
  • According to one of the player's wives, some players hit 150 to 200 home runs (with a 64-foot fence, she's probably not exaggerating that bad)

The players raised $1500 for charity, and (surprise, surprise) they could find themselves in the Guinness Book of World Records.

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Friday, August 22, 2008

Check. Your. Local. Listings.

In an effort to get up and running, posts here are going to be short and sweet.

Doesn't mean they can't contain a bucket of awesome, however.

With that said, if you get FitTV you should be watching Namaste Yoga. For your viewing pleasure...

It's yoga that can be enjoyed from your couch, with a can of Budweiser! The HR guy at my company turned me onto this by the way - god bless him.

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TOSS THE BURNER: Aug. 22, 2008

Hamlet 2 opens tonight, here's a delightful track from the movie titled Rock Me Sexy Jesus. after the links as well.

Fake PTI Video, Le Batard and Coach Wannstedt (NESW Sports)
Chromeo performs with Daryl Hall (via Pop Candy)
Chinese Men Mesmerized By Olympic Cheerleaders (Busted Coverage)
Chiukeung, LEGO Ambassador (And One)

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Thursday, August 21, 2008

TOSS THE BURNER: Aug. 21, 2008

Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh won the gold medal yesterday during a rain storm. (I don't know what I did to deserve that). I could see this match living in my DVR for quite awhile.

Anyone else lose count of how many time Karch Kiraly said wet balls?

Exclusive Clip From 'Choke' (via Pop Candy)
Kerri Walsh, Misty May-Treanor Win Gold in Rain Soaked Beach Volleyball (Fanhouse)
How to Get Around Nintendo's Pesky, 330-Pound Wii Fit Weight Limit (The Sporting Blog)
Grab A Beer & Watch Racewalking (Busted Coverage)

Seriously, what do I need to do to host my own women's beach volleyball tournament?

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Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The Mooks of Kickball, Part Five

I never thought it would get this out of hand...

TAMPA, FL -- Police have arrested a local kickball coach and charged him with raping a 21-year-old kickball player. 26-year-old Andre Javon Newton is also accused of threatening the player's life.

Investigators say Newton visited the woman in late July and asked her to help provide money for kickball uniforms.

When she went into a bedroom, he reportedly followed her, pushed her onto a bed, and then raped her.

Tampa Police say this is the same kickball league that spawned fights at Riverfront Park back in late-May when officers responded to a brawl of about 100-people. (ABC Action News - Tampa kickball coach accused of raping player)

With the past incidents, It would not shock me if Tampa had some sort of penal kickball league already in existence. Unfortunately for this mook, he's probably just got lots and lots of solitary confinement to look forward to.

Related Posts:

What the Hell is going on with these Kickball Leagues?
Women's Kickball League Banned From Tampa Parks, Files Complaint With NAACP

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Roller Derby Face-Off: Bacon versus Salt

Quality 1-on-1 roller derby match-up between two diet staples…

Salt really abandons the tenet of good sportsmanship with that croquet mallet.

It gets a little contentious at center track, before salt goes out of his gourd and skates straight into the wall.

Supports the assertion that bacon is awesome.

I would even eat it in ice cream.

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Frank Evans: Matador, Pensioner

His name is Frank "El Ingles" Evans. He's 66 years-old, and the only living English bullfighter.

He's slain over 300 bulls in his 40+ year career. This past weekend, he got back in the ring for the first time in three years since having a knee replacement and quadruple bypass heart surgery.

His next stop could be a matador tour of South America - so that he can say he's fought in every country in the world that will allow you to kill a bull inside a ring. (Fighting fit at 66: Britain's heart bypass matador back with a flourish)

This guy makes me feel bad about myself, and ashamed to know half the people I know.

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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

What's another 400,000 in Olympic condom distro?

Last week, I heard that the IOC and Co. were injecting the Olympic Village with a cache of condoms, totaling 100,000 in count.

Au contrere, mon frere.

The Beijing Health Bureau thought this initial number was tailored more to a Young Life church lock-in, and decided let's just bump that up to half a mil, shall we?

"About 400,000 free condoms have been distributed [by the Beijing Health Bureau] to 119 contract hotels of the Olympic Games to ensure that safe sex takes place during the fortnight-long event...Xinhua quoted Jin Dapend [Beijing Health Bureau’'s Party chief] as saying that condoms had been put in over 90,000 rooms of 424 hotels rated three stars and above." (

Unsure if it's related (it is), but Michael "Prowl-Mode" Phelps can't seem to get this look off his face since wrapping up...his competition portion of the games.


Beijing health bureau officials distribute 400,000 condoms for safe sex during Olympics
When Not Busy, Hoops Stars Flock To Beach Volleyball

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TOSS THE BURNER: Aug. 19, 2008

Enjoy the trailer for the ATHF movie "Colon"

Muxtape Shut Down For Now (via Pop Candy)
College Fan Sees Every Team, Needs New Hobby (Sports By Brooks)
Mixed Martial Arts in the Olympics? It Just Makes Sense (Fan IQ)
Team Domination (Mac Gs World)
Michael Phelps Sportsmanship, Funny Video (NESW Sports)

....linoleum knife!

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Friday, August 15, 2008

Choke Trailer & Radiohead...

Another unsubstantiated rumor crashes and burns...Turns out Radiohead did not contribute the entire score to Choke, the film based on the Chuck Palahniuk novel that opens in theaters Sept. 26.

All is not lost, however. Radiohead is indeed releasing a brand new tune for what looks to be a strong soundtrack:

Choke Soundtrack tracklist (being released Sept. 23 exclusively for digital download):

1. Ben Kweller - "The Rules"
2. The Natural History - "Don't You Ever" (rare)
3. Fiery Furnaces - "Navy Nurse"
4. Radiohead - "Reckoner"
5. Alap Momin - "Sin Terror"
6. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - "Satan Said Dance"
7. Buzzcocks - "Orgasm Addict" (rare)
8. Death Cab for Cutie - "No Sunlight"
9. Blitzen Trapper - "Wicked" (unreleased)
10. Ms. Tyree Sugar Jones - "If You Feel It"
11. My Morning Jacket - "Touch Me I'm Going To Scream Pt 1"
12. Shout Out Louds - "Bicycle" (rare)
13. Twilight Singers - "There's Been An Accident"
14. Nicole Atkins - "Crystal Ship"

Here you go with the trailer too...


Radiohead, Buzzcocks, My Morning Jacket Featured on 'Choke' Soundtrack (

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TOSS THE BURNER: August 15, 2008

Julia Child was a spy (sort of) prior to her career hosting a frightening cooking show. That is awesome.

A Philadelphia man sought to extort money… (Deadspin)
Forget About The Michael Phelps Diet. Try The Blogger Diet. (Don Chavez)
Dreadlock Deadlock Ends, Sort Of (FanIQ)
Rage To Rock During Democratic Convention (via Pop Candy)

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Thursday, August 14, 2008

Happy Anniversary Roller Derby!

Old School Derby Association informs us that yesterday marked the 73rd anniversary of the first Roller Derby, held in Chicago in 1935.

Hell on wheels was graciously brought forth by a gentleman named Leo Seltzer, who after reading a magazine article that said 93% of Americans had, at one point in their life, roller skated decided to launch the sport.

Seltzer's first iteration of Roller Derby had folks skating around an oval track for as many as 11-hours, in marathon races meant to simulate the 3000-mile distance between Los Angeles and New York.

The distance was quickly scaled back and the team concept was also adapted. The ruthlessness has always been encouraged, with five minute sprint races - which often saw elbows being thrown and collisions taking place - being inserted during the early derbies for extra prize money.

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Michael Phelps Gets Greedy! (Chows Down)

According to this, Phelps is more apt to house a lumberjack than stick to his alleged diet regimen.

(via The Guardian)

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TOSS THE BURNER: August 14, 2008

NYHoosier hipped me to One Day As A Lion the other day, which is a collaboration between Jon Theodore (The Mars Volta) and Zach De La Rocha (Some Band). It's definitely got balls, check it out here.

Making The Wire Panel, Go Listen (via Pop Candy)
Lil Wayne Is The Music Of Champions, Ask Michael Phelps (via The Big Lead)
The John Daly PR Machine Is Coming to a Hooters Restaurant Near You (AOL Fanhouse)
Mayorga back in the trash talk business (via With Leather)
Watching The UFC Does Not Make You Tough (Barstool Sports)

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Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Rajon Rondo, looking dapper...

Rajon Rondo is back to his blogging ways for Yardbarker - cause he's been doing some stuff.

Here he is at the ESPYs (...looking like the fifth top)

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Michael Phelps Eats 12,000 Calories a Day!

He refers to the left page of a Ponderosa menu as the Individual Medley. (NY Post)

This guy's diet makes my Thanksgiving look like peril of third world famine.

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Every Single Hot Beach Volleyball Photo from the Olympics...

The Angry T for Pope...see the madness here.

Slowly curbing my Olympic woes.

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TOSS THE BURNER: August 13, 2008

If you're a Pandora aficionado, create a Lil' Wayne playlist - you won't be disappointed. The story about him in Blender more or less predicts his imminent spontaneous combustion.

Congratulations to Jamie Mottram on the birth of his first kid (Mister Irrelevent)
Wake up with Misty May (Barstool Sports)
Lebron James, 2008 Olympic Diving Alternate, Video (NESW Sports)
The Ultimate NES Collection for sale (Average Dudes)
China's badminton bad boy has girls swooning (via Deadspin)

...I would have bet the house that there was at least a double ff, cc, or nn in aficionado.

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Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The Olympic Village is Gonna Be Rockin'!

If you weren't aware that the Olympics is a concentrated meat market, then you haven't tuned into beach volleyball yet, or synchronized swimming, or synchronized diving (or badminton, for that matter!)

Anyways, the IOC took notice...

"The UNAIDS, the Beijing organising committee BOCOG and International Olympics Committee are providing 100,000 condoms as part of a campaign on HIV prevention and anti-discrimination. At the Sydney Games in 2000 athletes quickly exhausted a supply of 70,000 and another 20,000 had to be brought in."

The initial plan to distribute 250,000 was met with religious protest, and the numbers were scaled back.

Chinese condom maker, Elasun, is cashing in big time on the Chinese internet with the Olympic sport-themed ad campaign that features cycling, basketball, archery, and swimming.




...The stick-man swimming upstream kind of messes with your head, no? And, the archery, well, that's just brutal.


Condoms to satisfy needs of "young, strong, single" Olympic athletes (The Star Phoenix)
Olympic condom ads (The Sydney Morning Herald)

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TOSS THE BURNER: August 12, 2008

Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh handled Cuba to improve to 2-0. What is that thing on her arm? Is it a tattoo? Is it fur?

Hot Clicks: Is Leryn Franco the Hottest Olympian? (SI Extra Mustard)
THE BOSS BOWL (via Pop Candy)
Jenn Sterger Set for "Sassy" Jet Roll (Randy's Radar)
Five Esquire Covers that did not make the cut (Cuzoogle)
Menugate (Naomi Can Blog)

...they actually explained Walsh's shoulder during the broadcast, but I was distracted by the athletic grace and superior team chemistry. (and the booty-action)

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Monday, August 11, 2008

John McCain...a Mediocre High School Junior Varsity Athlete

John McCain with his High School Wrestling Team (photo credit)

In a recent interview, John McCain told the LA Times he was looking forward to kicking back and watching the Olympics this week:

"We're all caught up in the excitement of it, especially us mediocre high school junior varsity athletes."

Define mediocre, John. According to this, you were known on the Episcopal High School wrestling team as both McNasty, and simply: punk.

Of course, this appears in stark contrast to his opponent's on-court prowess.

Could have been worse least McCain wasn't a band weenie.


Mediocre J.V. athlete John McCain eager to watch Olympics ( - Top of the Ticket)

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Eight year-old Hooks his Weight in Dolphin!

During a recent fishing expedition in the Florida Keys, young angler Mikey Cappazoli - a second grader! - hooked a 46 lb. dolphin - which matches his weight exactly.

Cappazoli battled the fish for over an hour! And it was the biggest catch of the day. (Sig Hansen can eat this kid’s lunch)

Cappazoli then went on to defeat his entire crew in the Bering Sea Challenge - also known as "cigarette chicken."


46-pound 8-year-old catches 46-pound dolphin (ESPN Outdoors)

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TOSS THE BURNER: August 11, 2007

R.I.P. Isaac Hayes, 1942 – 2008

United Football League to Launch in 2009, Commissioner Plans to Sign Michael Vick (Fanhouse)
Tiger's New Rival is Finally Emerging (The Sports Lounge)
NOW, That's What I Call Batting Music! (Joe Sports Fan)
Oh, Sergio... (Deadspin)
Isaac Hayes passes away (Balls Don’t Lie)

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Friday, August 8, 2008

Kicking off the medals with a blah-dow!

Enough of the pageantry and hullaballoo, time to start banging out medals...literally.

The first gold medal will be give out on an event with guns! (umm, awesome?) The home country could jump out to the early lead in the medal count, as China's Du Li is expected to take gold in this event - the Women's 10-Meter Gat-off. (fine, it's actually called the 10 m. Air Rifle)

Expectations for this snipette couldn't be higher, as China dominated the 2004 shooting events - winning four golds, nine medals in total. The pressure is so intense that her coach hired Du - who took gold at Athens - a psychologist leading up to the competition.

The Loot officially starts being handed out Saturday Morning when IOC President Jacque Rogge will present the medals himself to the winners of Women's Air Rifle.


Shooting Set To Kick Off Olympic Programme (The Telegraph)

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TOSS THE BURNER: August 8, 2008

Here's Radiohead at Lollapalooza last week (Seeing them tomorrow at All Points West! Huzzah!)

Gina Carano, Cris Cyborg to Fight (Not Each Other) at Next CBS EliteXC Show (Fanhouse)
In Case You Forgot, There Are Sports at the Olympics (FanIQ Blog)
A Blogger's Schedule (The Sports Dollar)
Winnie Cooper wrote a book! (Cuzoogle)
“Pineapple” Breaks Wednesday Record (The Zaz Report)

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Thursday, August 7, 2008

Beijing Stadium Designer Won't Attend Opening Ceremony

Chinese Artist, Ai Wei Wei, a design consultant for the Bird’s Nest Stadium, says he plans to stay away from the Olympic Opening Ceremony.

"The "Bird's Nest" National Stadium, which I helped to conceive, is designed to embody the Olympic spirit of "fair competition". It tells people that freedom is possible but needs fairness, courage and strength. Following the same principles, I will stay away from the opening ceremony, because I believe the freedom of choice is the basis of fair competition. It is the right I cherish most."

Ai Wei Wei

In a by-line article for The Guardian, Wei Wei says he wanted the stadium to represent freedom, not autocracy, and that China must change.

"We live in a world where everything is politicised, but some people insist the Olympics should be different. They imply that this fortnight of sport is somehow disconnected from history and psychology, unrelated to theory and morality and on a more elevated plane than base human nature. They argue that anyone who links the games with politics has sinister ulterior motives, that they are anti-Chinese. But the real reason they don't like politics is because any discussion of the subject reminds people who was responsible for making China so detached from the rest of the world."

The Olympics are planning to throw quite the bruhaha to celebrate the unveiling of this stadium. They’re going to blow up 35,000 fireworks in 1,800 locations around the city. People are so pumped, they’re not even complaining that Jackie Chan is performing. (musically!)

And as the designer at the center of this spectacle, Wei Wei stands to take a healthy share of the credit (Who designed the Athens Olympic Stadium? Zeus?) Wei is an important player and this is his big moment. The fact that he's willing to forego his ultimate celebration because he thinks it's all a guise and a sham is admirable.

Good for you, Asian Zeus. I respect your conviction.


Beijing Olympics: The Bird's Nest stadium (The Telegraph)
Why I'll stay away from the opening ceremony of the Olympics (The Guardian)

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TOSS THE BURNER: August 7, 2007

BLUEPRINT 3 from kwest on Vimeo.

NYHOOSIER let's us know that Blueprint 3 in on the way!

SI Pop Culture Grid (Extra Mustard)
It’s a Really Big Shoe (And One)
Programmer or Writer? (The Sports Dollar)
Natalie Gulbis Shows Leg In Cold British Temps (Busted Coverage)
The Michael Vick Saga Comes to Animal Planet (Over the Top)

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Wednesday, August 6, 2008

The Mooks of Kickball, Part Four: TRIAL OF THE CENTURY!

Just when I thought it had reached its peak

According to Washington City Paper, “The Greatest Kickball Lawsuit of All Time” has come to end.

"In 2006, the World Adult Kickball Association (WAKA) sued upstart DC Kickball, claiming that founder and former WAKA officer Carter Rabasa had stolen the association's proprietary rules and then defamed WAKA by calling it "the Microsoft of kickball." Offended and pouting, WAKA demanded $356,000 in damages. Had the legal recourse existed for it, they likely would have forced Rabasa to play bocce for the rest of his life." (DCist)

A motion filed in April by both sides to dismiss the case was just passed. (i.e. everyone woke up)

There is absurdity abound here, clearly.

  • The WAKA, LLC. A limited liability company (for kickball!). Sounds official, I know. You probably pay your rent to an LLC. Apparently, there is clout to be had in the kickball market, but the "Microsoft of Kickball?" The conglomerate empire...of kickball! Where am I? Even the Initech of kickball shouldn’t exist!

Forget the legal precedent set here, Let’s see if we can get a few of the same cuckoo puff law-types back involved, and reopen these proceedings with Frank Zappa suing for copyright infringement – citing the tampering of his song Waka Zawaka.

For the record, copyright infringement, tampering - I don’t know if any of this is proper terminology. If this wasn’t such fantasy camp stuff, I’d be more concerned.

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Tuesday, August 5, 2008

John Daly Tees Off a Beer Can

The proprietor of Murder Rock Golf Course is back at it again... (via i-am-so-bored)

What they don't want you to know, is that he teen wolfed a beer on the next hole.


Even with his game in decline, Daly still a draw (AP)

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Kids play in bouncy castle for 24 hours, get Guinness World Record!

It's a world record that would make most people dizzy.

Bounce, bounce, bounce ... for 24 hours. That was what eight boys in Michigan did this week in an effort to set a world record.

The boys began the attempt Friday morning at the Bounce-a-Lot entertainment center southwest of Detroit in Flat Rock.

They bounced two at a time in shifts in an inflatable castle. (Metro UK Weird News)

What grinds my gears about these kids is that they’re rubbing it in my face that somewhere Summer vacation still exist, and I am no longer privy to it. Grrr, just look at how carefree these brats look in their mesh shorts and athletic socks! It appears that one kid has an i-pod, you don’t think that I’m listening to music right now that lends itself to bouncing in a giant inflatable balloon? It’s Panama, by Van Halen!

Guinness World Records must still authenticate the record, a process that could take months.

Months? What is this, appeals courts? Is it that we have juveniles attempting this, regularly? If that’s the case, personally, I hope there are some real sob stories out there. Maybe an errant toenail severed the bouncy thing in the seventeenth hour. Maybe a twister swept one away.

Oh, and you better believe that I’m annoyed they did it in rotation. Rotation? What are they, training for the Cop-Out Junior Olympics? Somebody should inform these kids about other faux-endurance activities we have in this country, like team marathons. People love these, because they’re part of team and only have to run part of the race. So people who could never run a real marathon decide to do it…drunk.

Assuming everything checks out and they actually get the record, maybe they’ll luck out and get listed in the book next to the guy who holds the record for wearing the most t-shirts at one time.

Is there a chapter in the Guinness book for ‘People Who Set World Records, But Come Off Looking Like Failures’?

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Toss the Burner: August 5, 2008

Considering that the movie came out in 1985, these Goonies sneakers are pretty futuristic – minus the burlap sack they come in. (via Pop Candy)

Sports Center Fights Are Always Fun (Awful Announcing)
When Athletes Blog… (Ladies…)
NBC Hopes To Cook Up Football Fun w/New Book (SportsByBrooks)
Is Big Brown Really Back? (Barstool Sports)
This Should Go Well: Joe Torre Tells Manny to Shave His Dreads (Fanhouse)

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