A major event of the WFTDA season takes place this weekend, with 12 of the top derby squads on the East Coast meeting in Wisconsin for the annual Derby in Dairyland. A shot at the Nationals in November at stake.
True to form, this tournament plans to offer more than just fine Hell on Wheels competition, with live music, dancing, and coerced trips to roughhouse saloons i'm sure being offered. So, if you're in the Madison area - go gallivant. (I would!)
Host and notoriously charitable team, the Mad Rollin' Dolls, will be auctioning off plastered busts of several of the team members' chests during the weekend as well. The proceeds go to benefit breast cancer awareness. Here's the model of the Mad Rollins' Chop Suzzy.
More info on Derby in Dairyland can be had at www.derbyindairyland.com. Check out this video of the Mad Rollin' Dolls giving a tour of the city of Madison below...
Just because the track is no longer slanted, does not mean the semantics of competition can't be. For example, instead of conventional cheerleaders hell on wheels has....jeerleaders!
These diabolical pep mavens are sort of a cross between the Knicks City Dancers (if they were all tatted up) and the creatures that comprise the Raiders fan base.
Hell on wheels hits cable tonight, as this week's episode of Psych features show star Maggie Lawson and WWE Diva Mickie James playing roller girls.
The apropos titled ep Talk Derby to Me also features a couple of the L.A. Derby Dolls, and had the Vancouver Derby squad on-set to consult on the action. In a recent interview, James told TheDeadbolt.com,
I have a newfound respect for [derby girls] because, like I said before, the Vancouver roller-derby team was there with us showing us different stuff...I didn’t realize that they were as tough and that; they get out there and they pretty much beat each other up a little bit. I respect that being an athlete myself and getting beat up and beating people up all of the time.
Yeah, she's crazy. Love it.
All I cared to know about Psych before this was that Dorn is on it. But I can't pass up roller derby's first return to the small screen since Charlie's Angels! I'll tivo. Look for my reaction on twitter around 10 a.m. tomorrow, while I'm enjoying this with a bloody mary and a breakfast of bacon.
The new episode of Pysch premieres tonight on USA at 10 p.m. ET.
Hell on wheels was graciously brought forth by a gentleman named Leo Seltzer, who after reading a magazine article that said 93% of Americans had, at one point in their life, roller skated decided to launch the sport.
Seltzer's first iteration of Roller Derby had folks skating around an oval track for as many as 11-hours, in marathon races meant to simulate the 3000-mile distance between Los Angeles and New York.
The distance was quickly scaled back and the team concept was also adapted. The ruthlessness has always been encouraged, with five minute sprint races - which often saw elbows being thrown and collisions taking place - being inserted during the early derbies for extra prize money.
Whip It is about a female roller derby league in Austin, TX (the Ann Arbor of the Sun Belt region). It stars Ellen "home skillet" Page (Bliss Cavendar), a young girl who discovers the joy of being hell on wheels. It has nothing to do with the band Devo, evidently.
The casting call is searching for bald men, those with mohawks (either gender), roller skaters or people who know sign language.
So if you have one of these weird hobbies, or unfortunate coif situations, and you're over-18 - sign yourself up and see if Julia Gulia picks you.
According to an email from Real Style casting company, the baldies should be "willing to get their dome signed by Drew and the cast."
It does not specify this, but I'm willing to wager that a skullet (willing to get your dome signed, of course) will receive preferential casting consideration. Sign linguists or otherwise.
Hundreds of men, women and children, most in white with red scarves around their waists and red bandannas around their necks, gathered outside a French Quarter bar Saturday morning to be chased down Bourbon Street by members of New Orleans' roller derby league.
Oh. Hell.Yeah.
During the first half of that video, I was like "who is wielding a chainsaw on bourbon street right now?" And then the Elvis impersonators showed up on their motor scooters.
“The energy of the runners was electric” Mudflap Girl observed. “It was a truly amazing feeling that hundreds of people were stoked that we were there, and stoked to have their azzes whupped by us!!
(I lifted that insight from the Big Easy Roller Girls blog... I could never with good conscience take credit for the use of the term azz (pl.))
... oh, again, the Elvi on mopeds, you can learn more about them at rollingelvi.com
A couple years ago, Lali Outhoummountry, the captain of the San Francisco Bay Bombers, and her husband Patrick purchased the track that was used in the opening sequence of the film Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle.
Last Wednesday, the 1,500 lb. track that was being kept in the Outhoummountry's backyard was picked up by Tornado-like winds, and crushed to pieces.
According the Las Vegas Sun, Lali Outhoummountry said:
the boards started to writhe as the metal framework holding them together began to yield.
The track, which was being kept in the family's backyard, was a vintage high-banked track reminiscent of the tracks used in the 1960s when roller derby was a Saturday Afternoon television favorite. Today, the most competitive and popular leagues use a flat track.
Lali Outhoummountry and her husband, who both work in casinos and invested $25,000 dollars in the track, say they intend to rebuild it.
With no insider’s knowledge of what this report will entail, my prediction is that either you’ll hear a great deal about Brooke Leavitt…or ESPN will miss completely.
Leavitt is one of three women who in 2004 started the Kansas City Roller Warriors league, which started its fifth season earlier this Spring.
Like her cofounders – Eanna Johnson and Mandy Durham – Leavitt works a day job (she’s a librarian) and practices and competes with her team The Knockouts on the side. Unlike the other competitors, she does this all with only one arm. At the age of 3, Leavitt lost her right arm from the elbow down in a school bus accident.
When the League launched in 2004, Channel 9 News in Kansas City profiled Leavitt. This video shows the early days when league members practiced on a basketball court in the Roanoke Community Center with pile-on cones outlining the track. One of the anchors even refers to roller derby as the ugly stepsister of Saturday night World Championship Wrestling from the 60’s.
Along with The Knockouts, today the Kansas City Roller Warriors consists of four teams – The Black Eye Susans, Dreadnought Dorothys and The Victory Vixens make up the other three. Leavitt’s team name is Dirty Britches – some of her other teammates include Princess Slay-ya and Hunt Her Ass Thompson.
The rules of roller derby seem pretty straightforward. Each team has a jammer; and if you’re not a jammer then you’re a blocker. The object of the game is to get your jammer passed the other teams blockers, while stopping their jammer from passing your team of blockers.
The first match took place on March 19, 2005, check it out here:
An All-Star Team - that included Leavitt - from the league competed and won the Women's Flat Track Derby Association National last September in Austin, TX.
Check out the 2007 season re-cap video here and go to www.kcrollerwarriors.com to learn more about the league.
And be sure to watch SportsCenter on Sunday when they’ll be looking at roller derby’s resurgence in place around the country such as Austin.
True to form, this tournament plans to offer more than just fine Hell on Wheels competition, with live music, dancing, and coerced trips to roughhouse saloons i'm sure being offered. So, if you're in the Madison area - go gallivant. (I would!)
